MOWFTW Intro

                        Many blogs are sexy, and the writers use them for power, women and money.  However, we here at MOWFTW have decided to break out of this very sexy blog mold, so, in addition to getting money, women, and power, we’re also going to entertain anyone who decides to read this blog. And get laid.  All the time. But if you so choose to read forward, you must be warned, this blog will make you lose all interest in the outside world.  Your pets will starve, your work will go unfinished, and you’ll lose that shitty burger flipping job that you don’t tell anyone about.  This blog will CHANGE you, man.  You’ll be a different person.  Your friends will barely recognize you.  You WILL NOT be able to handle the awesomeness that is MOWFTW.  So just close the tab, pretend you never saw it, and go about your newspaper reading, pet feeding, myspacing, normal everyday life.  Because if you start, there’s no going back.  This is the matrix of blogs.  Okay, I understand, there’s someone else there, and you don’t want to run screaming from a computer.  But this isn’t a matter of pride.  It’s a matter of survival.  I’m warning you now, for the last time, there are things in this blog that could kill you without even doing anything.  CLOSE.  IT.

… Why are you still here?  Seriously, LEAVE.  You have NO IDEA.  We lost several writers while doing this blog.  It wasn’t even during the research period, where we sent them to the most dangerous corners of the globe.  They survived that, only to be killed by the headsplosion of editing this blog.  We started with a crack team of 63 of the best writers in the world, and we’re down to 1, me.  But that shouldn’t matter to you.  In fact, you shouldn’t even be reading this.  You should have left a long time ago.  You’ve got stones, my friend, I’ll give you that.  But the game is up.  From here on, the blog will start.  And it will be too late for you.  Seriously, you can’t imagine the power this blog holds.  To make it, we had to go through the seven circles of hell, and then punch the devil in the face.  Then we had to divide by zero.  Twice.

Still here?  Awesome, let’s do this.

-Evans